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By Andy and Renie Bowman

Editor’s note: This article discusses suicide. If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide, don’t hesitate to contact the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline at 988 or 1-800-273-TALK (8255).

Let me give my personal baseline right here at the beginning and then jump headlong from that starting point. God is the giver of life. He has a plan for every life He creates, and He says it is a good plan. 

Although, God says life is worth living, it is absolutely true that at times, it can seem to get almost unbearable. A person can suffer so much that eventually they begin to doubt whether staying alive is worth it. 

Hopelessness and anger can spur thoughts like, “If God is as loving as preachers like to say that He is, why has He let life be this way for me?” A person can then walk even further down that dark path wondering, “Is there really even a God out there? And if there is, my hopeless life is definite proof that He doesn’t watch or even care about people suffering.” 

Craving release from their emotional or physical pain, somewhere in the midst of all that agony, an individual may begin to entertain thoughts of taking their own life. After all, if they are a believer in an eternity with the God who created them, they may feel they would be much better off with Him. 

If they are not a believer, they may simply want The End of everything for themselves. “Not existing at all has to be better than this hell I am enduring,” they may believe.

But a desperate person is blinded to two real truths.

No one is able to see around the corner into the future. Life circumstances can, and often do, change. Plus, there is no way to know or understand what God has in mind using their present pain. Only later can they realize what He was accomplishing.

Another truth: suicide leaves in its wake a series of unanswered questions, unresolved issues and hurting people. Suicide is an escape for one, but a permanent pit for those who loved them. 

But at this point, I offer a plea; Do not judge that person who chose to commit suicide. God alone is worthy to be their judge, not you or me. We do not know nor understand the tremendous pain that caused their decision.  Please realize there must have been enormous depression involved. We need to remember that they felt absolutely hopeless and alone. 

Lastly, if someone admits to you that they are thinking of suicide, there are a few important things you can do.

Offer to listen without condemning or criticizing them. Acknowledge you do not have all the answers but passionately repeat that you do care about them. Offer to help them find a qualified counselor. If they convince you by their words and behavior that they are definitely in trouble, ask if they have a plan in place. Seek gently for details about actually carrying it out. Many who have given up on life getting any better will have spent some time seriously strategizing how they are going to die. Call 988 if you are convinced the person is truly in danger.    

The CoffeeTime Column is part of the Bowman’s ministry of preaching, writing, singing and counseling. They also stay busy with public appearances and their radio program heard on The Gospel Station Network’s twenty stations. More information on them can be found at coffeetimewithandyandrenie.com. 

Sponsored by Premier Coatings, Montgomery, AL at (334) 288-3351. Podcasts available at Coffeetimecolumn.com. Send any responses to: andybowman839@gmail.com.